Your arguments are the extreme opposite of "wives submit to your husbands." You want husbands to completely submit to their wives. When, in actuality, if people stop being feminist and read the text for what it is, you realize that both are supposed to happen. Wives are supposed to give their husbands leadership over the family (examples would be allow him to make big decisions for the family WHILE STILL making her opinion known, trusting him to lead the family spiritually just like Jesus leads us) and the husband is supposed to give himself up for the wife (examples would be putting her first in his life under God and serving her in this way). I am a woman myself and completely rebuke the feminist ideas because they are not biblical. Instead of getting offended that your husband is supposed to lead you and your family, accept it as a wonderful gift from God and a blessing and act of servitude from your husband as he does his absolute best to make sure the best comes for your and your children.
The only truthful statement in this entire comment is: “…both are supposed to happen.” Rose got that part right. Both husband and wife are to submit to one another. This blog is focused on the tyranny of one-way submission that is taught by so many who claim to be Christians. Although complementarian preachers may tell husbands to love their wives, when the preachers are asked to deal with unloving husbands, they blame the wives instead. Basically then, their teaching about husbands loving their wives self-sacrificially is meaningless, and husbands know this. Wives find out about it when they go to their pastors for help after being abused--usually for a long time--by their husbands.
The rest of Rose’s comments are based on falsehood. “You want husbands to completely submit to their wives.” Although this statement is true, I do believe it is biblical for husbands to completely submit to their wives, that is not what Rose meant. From the context it is clear that she meant to say that I think ONLY husbands are to completely submit to their spouses. I never said that, nor do I believe it, and no egalitarian or Evangelical Feminist believes that, either.
The next false statements are: “if people stop being feminist and read the text for what it is…” and “Wives are supposed to give their husbands leadership over the family…” If one reads the text for what it is, one finds that husbands are NEVER told to lead their wives, and wives are never told to give their husbands leadership over the family. Never. In fact, when one checks the concordance for “guide” in I Tim. 5:14, one finds the translators chose the wrong word. They should have chosen “rule.” Paul was telling young women to get married, bear children, and RULE their homes. They were to be the “head of the house.” Husbands are never told to do that. If wives are told to rule their households, why would they "give" that rulership to someone else? Those who are church leaders are to manage their children, but nothing is ever said about husbands, even those who are church leaders, managing their wives. Rose, you need to read the text for what it is. You don’t even have to be a feminist to see the truth that is there.
Rose also says: “Instead of getting offended that your husband is supposed to lead you and your family, accept it as a wonderful gift from God and a blessing and act of servitude from your husband as he does his absolute best to make sure the best comes for your and your children.”
Rose, I am not offended when a husband practices loving self-sacrifice as he is commanded. But I have one leader, Jesus, and I reject any others. When a man—even one who is my husband—attempts to take the place of Jesus in my life, I will—rightfully—get very offended. I will be offended that he is practicing exactly what Jesus told him not to do, lord it over me, and that he is trying to convince me to agree with his twisting of scripture. I refuse to live by his scripture-twisted rules. As Paul stated in Galatians 2:5, I will not yield to him, I will not be put in bondage, no, not for an hour, because that would subvert the truth of the gospel.
The Bible DOES say, “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God,” and then shows how that is done. Wives, by submitting to their husbands, and husbands by loving their wives self-sacrificially. Nothing, absolutely NOTHING, is said about husbands ruling or leading, being the authority over their wives, making the final decisions, nor about wives giving their husbands those privileges or entitlements. All those directives are entirely MAN-made doctrine.
And that man-made doctrine has the very damaging side-effect of CAUSING domestic abuse and domestic violence. It harms everyone it touches, including Rose.
Waneta Dawn is the author of "Behind the Hedge," a novel about a wife who discovers traditional marriage advice doesn't always work. See www.wanetadawn.com