God is our father. He told all of us to submit to one another; wives to submit to their own husbands and husbands to love their wives so much they will sacrifice for their wives. Complementarians don't seem to understand that their focus on wife submission and husband authority is in itself a sin that would be punishable if their own daughters did it.
Consider: if you the parent gave directions to 2 of your children. You told your daughter to set the table, and your son to vacuum the dining room floor. While your daughter sets the table, your son doesn't even bother getting the vacuum out. Instead, he critically watches his sister's every move.
He says to her, “Mom (or Dad) told you to HURRY UP and set the table.”
Your daughter replies, “She didn't tell me to hurry. She just said to set the table. And she told you to vacuum the floor.”
“No, she didn't,” your son says, “she told me to make sure you do a good job, and do it fast. Now get a move on!”
Which of the children pleased you, the parent? The one who was obeying you, or the one who made himself into a god, added to your words to your daughter, and ignored and disobeyed your instructions to him? Would you allow your son to get by with disobeying you?
Sadly, quite a number of complementarian parents WOULD allow their sons to get by with such behavior, and they'd make their daughters accountable for their brother's behavior, and tell their daughters to vacuum the floor after dinner, too.
However, if the behaviors were reversed, and the daughter was the one who had not obeyed, who had added to the directions for her brother, and focused on his work instead of her own, she would be punished.
Sadly, those same parents encourage their sons to focus on wife subjection, change the command of God for husbands to “authority,” instead of love and sacrifice, and mistreat their wives, sisters and mothers.
The disobedience to God begins at childhood, when parents hold girls responsible for obeying, but dismiss the disobedience of boys, saying “boys will be boys.” Some parents purposely raise boys to take charge of and assume superiority over others—especially girls—instead of taking charge of themselves and considering others better than themselves. Meanwhile, they raise girls to assume the mantle of slavery, obedience, and inferiority to males.
It is as children that boys learn to disrespect women and girls, and believe themselves to be so superior that domestic abuse is the natural manifestation of their strongly taught and deeply engrained belief.
But God is not mocked. Children who disobey Him, will reap what they have sown.
Waneta Dawn is the author of "Behind the Hedge," a novel about a wife who discovers traditional marriage advice doesn't always work. See www.wanetadawn.com
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